You only lose what you cling to. ~ Buddha
Often in life we find ourselves holding on to things that no longer have value – objects, people, relationship and so much more. It is hard to let go when the clinging has become not only a habit, but, possibly, a bit of a pleasure. We tell ourselves that we are strong for being able to ‘stick with it’, or that we are the better person for ‘not letting go’. Well guess what? You’re not and the only person taking pride in your pain is YOU.
Before I begin let me apologize for not having a ton of before, during and after photos. When I began these projects I hadn’t decided to write blog posts about the process. The projects are part of what started me on this blogging path.
This particular project was the beginning of me learning to love my home. I had done other larger projects, which I will share, but they did not send me into a whirlwind of home improvements like this one did. With this project I chose to go with something annoying that I could easily fix…my stairs.
Years ago I purchased my home as an investment. The plan was to rent out the main home and the carriage house for additional income to invest in my flip projects. One bad tenant, busted pipes, the real estate crash and a broken marriage later I found myself living in a home that I had no intention of ever occupying, and that needed enormous amounts of work for which I had neither the time nor the finances. Long story short I was between a rock and an avalanche.
You might wonder why I share all of this with you. I do because I want you to understand my mindset at the beginning of this journey. For years I had this defeatist attitude, like I couldn’t do anything to improve my situation, when the truth is I WOULDN’T. Now don’t get me wrong I made my home presentable enough that it wasn’t the total embarrassment that it had been in the beginning, but that was about it. Every moment of energy I put into making my home better for me and my girls was a reminder of how much I had failed. It became a penance and I dreaded facing it.